Thursday, 3 November 2016
Common discipline mistakes parents make
1. Yelling or screaming
This helps nothing and only scares your child. I understand
that sometimes things completely frustrate you but
remembering that is not your child’s fault can help calm your
anger. Correcting your child in a calm way is safer for you and
your child.
2. Long explanations
Your child is not an adult and giving them a long explanation
about why they can’t do something doesn’t correct their
behavior. Keep your explanations short and to the point. You
don’t have to water down your reasoning, but don’t go on and
on about it. Having a simple explanation means you can both
understand what was wrong and move on.
3. Bribery
One huge mistake I see parents making all the time is bribing
their child. Saying you will buy your child ice cream later if
they stop crying is now is not solving any problems. Your child
needs to respect you for the decisions you make and
shouldn’t get some reward just for being obedient.
4. Not following through
If you tell your child you’re going to take something away as a
punishment but then don’t, what does your child learn? They
learn they can get away with making mistakes without
punishment. Hollow words don’t discipline your child. Your
child will eventually realize that you don’t follow through with
your word and test your limits more and more.
5. Inconsistency
Let’s say that your daughter’s room is a mess and you tell she
needs to clean it up and keep it clean but then two days later
it turns back into a pigsty. Not saying a word is a huge
mistake. Be consistent with your rules and your punishments.
If you are not consistent, your child will end up confused and
unsure of your expectations, leaving more room to make
mistakes. It might be annoying to constantly remind your little
one how to behave, but that is how they learn.
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6. Counting down
The 3-2-1 countdown does not work as well as you would
hope. Yes, maybe your child does listen but really consider
what that is teaching them. Obedience should never be
delayed. I’m not saying they should be a servant to your rules
but your children should learn to be obedient when you ask,
not at the last second.
7. Not disciplining appropriately
If you have a toddler and he/she grabs your lipstick tube and
draws on the wall and you also has a seven-year old who also
does the same thing, the punishment should be different.
Understand that your toddler does not know any better and
your older child should know that drawing on a wall is wrong.
Your seven-year old deserves a short time out while you need
to give a small scold to your toddler so he/she knows better
and won’t do it again. Each age group has a different mental
capacity to understand things and each should be disciplined
accordingly.
8. Bring up the past
Just because your child made a mistake before does not
mean that they will do the same thing again. Don’t hold the
past against them.
9. Skipping the life lesson
After a time out, showing your child the life lesson to be
learned from their mistake is one of the smartest discipline
decisions a parent can make. Pull your child to the side and
sincerely explain what they did wrong and help them
understand that you love them and want them to succeed.
10. Forgetting the love
Loving your child is what I believe to be the most important
action to keep in mind when it comes to discipline.
Even if you ignore all the suggestions listed above and follow
just this one, the relationship you create with your child will be
full of warmth and smiles. There is something about the love
parents offer their children that can change everything.
Familyshare
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